Dear LJ,

Long ago and far away when we first met, I was a girl barely 23 years old. Naive, idealistic, far more patient with people than she should have been, just learning the way the world works and just what she was capable of. Among other things. I come to you today in a way I never have before: as a thirty-something. And I come in a way I have so very many times before: with pictures! Wait... that sounded really dirty. What I meant is, er, HERE HAVE A PICTURE POST!

And a fish head:


But that comes later. First I flew to Boston (where aristophanes lives) and learned the true meaning of the word "awkward". ( What is awkward, exactly? )
Neal picked me up and we, uh, ate naan. Yeah, that's what it's called now. I don't know exactly HOW his bed got broken, but I suspect it was related to the structural flaw that did in my bed and couch. And nearly the dining room table. You know, look, I think really what we should focus on here is how well made that hammock is. Man, that thing should teach lessons in structural integrity. Because, er, naan is heavy. Obviously that is what I meant.

Moving right along... the next day we drove down to take the fast ferry to Gay Head (okay, technically to Oak Bluff's, but both are on Martha's Vineyard and my brain nearly collapsed at the opportunity for gay head jokes, ESPECIALLY when ferries were involved). View from the deck:



I liked how Fearless and Explorer are right next to each other. Down below, Neal just breaks ALL the rules:



[insert joke about blocking the hatch on the ferry to Gay Head here]

Once on the island, we took a taxi van thing to Edgartown with some man who led to many lulz and inside jokes with the rest of the group later. Moped wedding, baby. It's the only way to go. You just don't get it. ONWARD TO THE RESORT!



We stayed in one of the rooms with a turret. The bed was like heaven, if heaven was actually a really comfortable bed. I wanted to take so many naps that I started to suspect that the verbena-scented conditioner was drugged. That night we had cocktails on the veranda, followed by dinner with lotttttts of wine. At some point I went up to the room to get my coat and took a picture of what I thought of being 30 so far:



And then we went out to experience the wild Martha's Vineyard nightlife. Hint: there were fish.



That's Becky, and I promised to email her these pictures. I wouldn't hold the fish, but I DID touch it. Then I drank. I drank a LOT. I think I told the waiter or the bartender that it was my birthday which is, apparently, the magic word to get ridiculously strong drinks. At some point we were inside. There were pizzas or... something. I talked to the band and asked them to play The Downeaster Alexa, but they didn't, although I think we left pretty much as soon as they started playing because they were loud, but really I have no idea. I WAS DRUNK LIEK OMG:



At some point we stumbled back to the hotel, I stole a flower on the way from one of the ridiculously well landscaped yards, and then I puked my guts out while Neal held my hair. No one remembers how I managed to get my clothes off. I wonder if I was throwing up naked? I really have no idea, and truly that is THE WAY to say goodbye to your 20s!

The next day I didn't take a single picture. We had breakfast and then I did some yoga and watched A&E while Neal had a meeting. Shortly after that there was a bus tour of the island, but it was pouring rain and not only could we not see anything, but the tour guide (Jocko Jaques-o?)was completely unintelligible. Really the only thing you could understand him saying was "Carly Simon" and that's only because he must have said it nine million times. Apparently she owns everything on Martha's Vineyard. EVERYTHING. Even Jocko. We saw Jackie-O's driveway and property, at least 5 of Carly Simon's houses, James Taylor's spread, and Billy Joel's house in the fishing village. Also where the Clintons and Obamas spent their summer vacations. Then there was napping, then a million mile walk to the fancy restaurant where we had dinner. The salad was fantastic, the rest so-so, and I talked to people about alpacas.

Sunday, however, was chock full o' fun. We went out walking in the morning and visited the lighthouse across from the hotel. Neal made up facts about lighthouses for me. I'm pretty sure this belongs to Carly Simon:



After walking for awhile, it was time to go sailing aboard the Magic Carpet:



Neal's on a boat! He's on a boat! He's on a motherf***ing boat! (he had no idea what I was talking about, so just to clear that up: http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/clips/digital-short-im-on-a-boat/998982/ And, in retrospect, all those jokes I made about the boat that was on the farm PROOOOOBABLY would have made more sense in context.



Moving right along... I WAS ON A BOAT!



I would have tried for a better picture, but my camera died about then. By the time I charged the battery... OH YEAH WE WERE DRUNK AGAIN:



And this was even before the like 19-types-of-wine-tasting and nightcaps at the hotel (holy shit, the tv is on some dance show and they are playing some female cover of "Everybody Knows" by Leonard Cohen! /awesome randomness):



And then it was Monday morning and time to leave, but not before a brief reminder of why this is where the rich and famous come to get away from it all (and/or why Carly Simon snapped it all up):



From there we drove back to Neal's house where I started renovating his bathroom. No, you really cannot take me anywhere. I will renovate houses with the slightest provocation, and that painted tile was enough to provoke anyone. Spent another night there and then we got up at five AM to take an airport shuttle so I could fly out and he could pick up a rental to drive to Maine, but not before making fun of everything that ever existed over coffee. Especially the heath hens.

So, in conclusion, the trip was fantastic. I haven't had that much fun since... the last time I had that much fun. It was a wonderful, wonderful way to ring in this new portion of my life for which I have so much hope and anticipation. Thank you to everyone who sent cards and gifts and just generally made me feel special. I deeply appreciate having such wonderful friends and I hope that I can be as kind and generous with you as you are with me.